Monday, April 12, 2010

Ultrasound = Ultrareal

See that? I made it. Three cheers for me! My wife and I had our first ultrasound a couple weeks ago and heard our unborn child's heartbeat for the first time. How intense is that? I think, like most men, it is kind of a surreal feeling when your wife first waves that pee-stick in your face and declares she's pregnant. For me, I thought to myself, "Wow, isn't that something. She's pregnant. I wonder when it happened? Is this going to be the end of my life? Are we not going to have spontaneous nights of passion or play Pogs until midnight anymore? I wonder what it'll look like. Asian kids are really cute. Oh, wouldn't twins be awesome? One boy. One girl. Half Asian kids. I hope they'll like Pogs."

That was my entire thought process in one second. Then she was like, "You can't tell anyone for 3 months until we are sure we won't have a miscarriage." I said that was fine and that I didn't want to tell everyone and then have to hear them all say sorry and feel bad for me should something happen. The next day, my wife, who is a teacher, is at school literally waving her urinated-on pregnancy test in the air exclaiming, "MY HUSBAND IS BOUND! I GOT HIM LOCKED DOWN FOR LIFE! HE HAS TO DO WHATEVER I SAY FOR NINE MONTHS AND IF HE DOESN'T I'LL SCREAM AT HIM AND BLAME THE HORMONES! HAHAHA!" No not really, but I think that's what women think at least once during their pregnancy. She was excited and couldn't hold it in. I don't blame her. We show excitement in different ways. She shows it by telling everyone and jumping up and down. I do it by scratching myself, watching Pawn Stars on the History Channel, and treating myself to Oreos and milk. 

Anyways, my point is that men and women may respond very differently to the news at first. My wife was a little panicked that I wasn't jumping around like crazy. I wasn't jumping around because our "trying" was exactly one time and she got pregnant. Jeez. "Just my luck," I thought to myself, but that didn't mean I wasn't excited. Like I said in the beginning, it was a surreal feeling and I didn't know how to react. In the same vein, I think it may sometimes play into how men are raised. Men are taught by society to show limited emotion. Women are exactly the opposite. You want me to leap around a screech with you? Ask society why not. I'd love to substitute my Business Weekly for an US Weekly once in awhile, but I guess that's life. I was surprised and happy, but I wasn't going to leap hand-in-hand with her making synchronized jumps. 

Weeks later when we heard the heart beat it suddenly became real. It was beating at like 170 beats per minute! It was a little flickering dot on the screen, but that moment is a crazy feeling. Never had I felt something like that. It was excitement, anxiety, anticipation, and a little panic all at once. I truly believe it will be a moment you can reminisce back to when your older and pin point it as one of the days where your life took a dramatic turn......but I'm still not doing synchronized jumps. Perish the thought.

1 comment:

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